Saturday, October 16, 2004

Karl Rove Is Pissed

Mr. Bush has a certain affinity for male cheerleaders, having been one himself back in his college days. So when the news came down that his number one cheerleader, Bill O'Reilly, may have been involved in some sort of unseemly activity with one of his female producers Bush was beside himself.

"Damnit Karl, first Rush, now O'Reilly!" I'm sure the prez lamented to his most trusted advisor.

I'm sure Rove has to be asking himself how everything can go so terribly wrong all at once. His message machine is off kilter. And let's face it, his client didn't do him any favors in the debates. But what can he do about it, he can't shit a good debater, as they say down in Texas. So with three dismal debate performances, and a noticeable drift in the polls, what happens. The republican machine does something it almost never does, it went OFF message. I don't believe Rove's strategy to spin the debate and set up the home stretch was "there's something about Mary." See, Rove knows that this election is going to be won or lost on Iraq. But of course Rove can't tell Lynne Cheney, who looks more like a lesbian than her daughter, how to spin. And once Lynne let loose, the talking heads had their post-debate talking point. They were shocked, shocked I tell you, that a woman, who they don't believe has the right to marry, would have her OTHER, more applicable right trampled on by Kerry's mention of her during the debate.

Now the dreaded "L" word is no longer "liberal", it's "lesbian". Now Mr. Rove must get the troops on message, must drum up the fear factor. "Security moms of the world unite!" You bet Rove is pissed, his spin machine is spinning wildly out of control, and there's precious little time left. And those drifting poll numbers...oh, to have one more cheerleader.